Just two days ago while I was cooped up on a hill in the western part of Singapore (where they have left nature intact) with 12 other men in green, we were running out of topics to talk about.
We had run through the gamut of Religion (scandals mostly), Politics (completely scandalous), and now like most guys deprived of a skirt for days on end, we moved on to Sex (Centerfold of Scandals in “Corruption”-Free but not Sex-Free Singapore).
One of the guys who was doing his last high-key ICT (In Camp Training) confessed that he did not know what a CB leaf (see picture) was or why it was called so (“Chee Bye” is the Hokkien phrase for the vagina).
The gang then pounced on our newbie, the latest posting to our node (1st ICT) and certainly one guy who we affectionately called “Boy Boy” for his obedience and lack of a certain “weathered” experience of the world. Gosh, “Boy Boy” also calls me Sergeant all the time and I believe I’ve hardly been addressed as such in all of my reservist days and even my active days.
After a while, with much puzzled look on the size of the leaf (nope, that’s not it), it’s overall shape (not so too), he finally discovered the answer (just google it and you’ll find something). Much to our chagrin, he told us he just recently tied the knot two months ago.
It’s really something to bear with the discomfort of the great outdoors in our army greens, eating combat rations and pooping in the bushes in the fastest possible time (to get the least number of mosquito bites on our bare bottoms and exposed thighs). Hell, I know of several buddies who have such mental willpower to hold it all in and self-constipate so that they can altogether avoid the unpleasant business of doing big business.
It’s another thing when you put all these men together with nothing much to do but talk. Men just don’t talk like women do. We put out all the facts, we analyse, we criticise, and we jump at the opportunity to offer solutions.
And then we move on to other news-worthy topics.
After that, we look for the nearest stack of cards, or some solid fuel to go build a fire. Nowadays, I notice the handphone is quite a good distraction too.
It’s just the way men are wired.
Good thing was that our reinforcements came in the nick of time, and now jolly old Sergeant can go to watch Jack Neo’s Ah Boys to Men in the movie theatre and laugh at the good ‘ol CB leaf shenanigans.